OPEN THREAD: do I need bridesmaids and groomsmen, or can we just have shared attendants?

OPEN THREAD: do I need bridesmaids and groomsmen, or can we just have shared attendants?

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My partner and I don't really have separate friends. We have a fabulous, shared group of mates of mixed genders from university - so how do we decide which of us got which friends on "our side"? I've seen tons of weddings with mixed gender bridal parties, but what about one shared party? Is that a thing? I want to avoid drama.

-Drama-phobic bride to be

Such a great question! We have indeed featured a million mixed-gender wedding parties (you can check out our HUGE archive for amazing pics!), but many folks still assign their attendants a "side." This begs the question... side of what?

Is it literally just the side they stand on in pictures? (If so, what if you pose them differently?) Is it the side they stand on during the ceremony? (If so, remember that some attendants don't stand with the couple during the ceremony). Is it just what you're going to call them or who asks them? (If so, remember that some folks use names like "Adventure Party" that doesn't imply any belonging to the bride or the groom.)

This is all to say, the whole ideas of "sides" may revolve around traditions you're not even including in your wedding... so it may not matter. But let's ask our beloved community...

Are any of you having a collective wedding party? Not bridesmaids or groomsmen, or even bridesboys or groomgirls, but just one shared party?

PS: Have an advice question for an open thread post? Email us!

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